[This is the fifth installment of posts from Faith, AGE’s CaregiverU Coordinator and personal expert on being a family caregiver – you’ll continue hearing from her on a range of topics once a month.]
Lawn care. Hmmm, not my expertise. I do enjoy the sight of a well tended lawn, though. Thick green grass, nicely edged, pretty stones in a ring around each tree, neatly trimmed trees, front flower
bed blooming. All very nice, but I am clueless as to how to create that, and probably not much better on knowing how to maintain it. You see, I’ve been married close to 45 years and we’ve had a system called ‘his work’ and ‘her work’. I took care of the inside of the house and he took care of the outside. The work inside of the house and all my other responsibilities took up all of my time and then some, so I paid little attention to the work in our yard. Seven years ago when we moved into our current house, I was eager to learn how to do yard work and hoped to work together with my spouse to plan the landscaping and share in the labor. My dear husband was insulted by those plans—refer back to ‘his work’ and ‘her work’ above. The yard was definitely his domain and I’d best remember that. In the name of peace and harmony, I took my rightful place, and simply enjoyed the loveliness.
I enjoyed it until now. Now my spouse is not so capable of planning and organizing the yard work. He sometimes forgets how to start the lawn mower and claims it doesn’t work. Our good neighbor comes over to get it going, and tells him the mower just needed an adjustment. Helpful friends give him bedding plants for the flower beds, thinking he would enjoy digging in the dirt again. He enjoys the digging and puttering, but then becomes very anxious because the plants aren’t thriving. That’s when he asks me what to do, and, I’m –clueless. He worries about the bald spots in the front lawn and then I worry. Surely bald spots are not a good thing, but what does one do? Continue reading →